
When brutal murdering starts in a small riverside town, the sheriff must investigate and face the horrific past.... (Full plot summary below)
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When brutal murdering starts in a small riverside town, the sheriff must investigate and face the horrific past.
Leave your thoughts about River of Darkness.
| User ReviewJoy MKurt angle is as boring on screen as he was in wwe. Kevin nash made a gorgeous demon. Psyco Sid is still ugly - they didn't even the make up lmao. it was ok I guess. |
| User ReviewWes SHard to follow plot with bad make-up and silly plot elements. Poor uninteresting characters that make the film really hard to sit through. There are some interesting concepts, but for the most part the film lacks a good execution. |
| User ReviewCraig EOne Which Definately Should Be Avoided. 3 Ghosts Kill People In A Small Town, Although A Basic Story Like This Has Been Pulled Off Before. Look At The Script, The Acting, The Deaths And The Whole Direction Of The Movie. Stars: Kurt Angle, Kevin Nash & "Sycho" Sid Vicious |
| User ReviewNolan PTerrible film. Kurt Angle might be up for a few awards for this one though,best performance in a 2 tall dickheads come back from the grave film since '2 tall dickheads come back from the grave' starring Kate Blanchett and Judi Dench...nah I'm messing,this film is shite so is kurt angle. it's one of those films where the cover and the graphic design on the front of the DVD looks miles better than the actual film. |
| User ReviewAaron BThis was so bad that me & my boyfriend bailed on it after just 10 minutes. It also seemed that it was filmed in High-Definition video instead of film stock which only added to the overall cheapness off the flick. I feel like I want a refund! Oy Vey. (:\ |
| User ReviewAdam EOK, so I knew this would be a 'so bad it's funny' film, but this is just taking the piss... The film stars Kurt Angle as the Sheriff of Cedar Creek, a southern US town host to a number of murders by the Jacobs boys, who happen to be local lads killed 30 years ago. The film is so bad I don't know where to begin. Lets start with characterisation. Main characters in films like this are supposed to be guys that you can get behind and root for. However, Sheriff Angle is portrayed as so much of a dunce that it's just impossible. The fact that the local lawman has absolutely no knowledge of the murders that made his hometown famous is absolutely ridiculous, making it no wonder he's portrayed as a figure of fun by the townsfolk. It is also worth noting the Sheriff's insistence on wearing blue jeans as opposed to uniform trousers with his sheriff's shirt and cap makes him look more like a gas station attendant than an officer of the law. The writing and direction are horrendous too. If they were going for a Garth Marenghi's Darkplace kind of feel, then its a masterpiece, but you know they weren't. The amount of awkward pauses, clunky dialogue, and poor camera work are just laughable. The paranormal investigators who come to town also make light of the writing, given they claim to have read about the killings in the news, despite there seemingly being no media coverage of the murders whatsoever. Also, the unwillingness of any of the townsfolk to question the supernatural explanation for the murders is hilarious. Then theres the quality of the film itself. Now, in 2007, I made a short film at college titled "Biff Saxon Versus The Emo Plague Terror", on a handheld DV camera. Aside from some issues I had with outdoor shots and wind noise, the quality difference between the two films is practically non-existent. The film does not look professional in the slightest. Speaking of which, a quick look on IMDB will tell you River of Darkness cost an estimated $3.2 million to make. Watching this film, the only possible explanation for that cost on THIS film is thus: Embezzlement. Someone HAD to have been on the take for this film to end up looking like it did. How such a sum of money could be spent, only for the movie to look like it was made on roughly the same budget as your average Crimewatch Re-enactment, we can only wonder. Not to be boastful, but I'm willing to bet I could make a better looking film for about £5,000, if that. The treatment of the Jacob Boys is baffling as well. Played by wrestlers Kevin Nash and Sid 'Vicious' Eudy, they receive about 2 minutes of screen time between them. Nash has already proven he has some acting ability after his turn in The Longest Yard, and is known in wrestling as a good talker, so why not give him more than one line, let alone more screen time? As for Angle, this is his second film with director Koehler, with another in the works. If he's thinking of being the next Duane 'The Rock' Johnson, he's already done his chances irreperable damage with what has to be the most poorly made film I've ever seen. There is irony to be found here. While John Cena's films (and the rest of WWE Films fare for that matter) are poor at best, they at least look professional. It had to happen that the film with TNA connections would be a poorly made, poorly written, illogical mess by comparison. |
| User ReviewJames EThe main stars of the movie are three wrestlers : Kurt Angle, Kevin Nash and Psycho Sid Vicious... when these are main stars you really can't expect a lot from the movie...everything was terrible.. the acting, the script, the lighting, the stunts, special effects...complete garbage... if you are a wrestling fan wanting to see your heroes in a movie, skip this one and go re-watch a Steve Austin, John Cena, or Rock film; they aren't great but at least they aren't awful either... |
| User ReviewOwen DI have left more entertaining stuff in my toilet! |
| User ReviewTheresa LThis was so bad that me & my boyfriend bailed on it after just 10 minutes. It also seemed that it was filmed in High-Definition video instead of film stock which only added to the overall cheapness off the flick. I feel like I want a refund! Oy Vey. (:\ |
| User ReviewJuliet HOne of the worst scripts ever. Written, Directed and Produced by the same man who I believe did it because no one else was stupid enoughto think that the abysmal script would work as anything other than toilet paper. The acting was so wooden that the rest of the cast made Angle and co look like the spirits of Olivier and the cinematography would have been poor for Home and Away. Just don't get me started on the 'special effects'. In all this was amateur hour at its very worst. |